January, 23rd 2013
I had graduating paper consultation this morning. I have been doing it for few months. I actually enjoy the process of writing my GP because of the consultant. I found that he is so kind-hearted. The most important thing is that he resembles my father, my late father. That is why I am always happy to have the consultation. Today, he said that he would correct the whole of my GP and if there was no revision at all, I should submit it directly on Friday. To be honest, it is a good news and bad news as well. Why? I am happy that I have finished writing it. But I am totally sad since I will never meet him anymore. I really like him as if I found my father again. I know that it is not proper but it is the fact and it hurts actually….. I don’t know whether I should tell it here or not but I have no one to share.
Rabu, 23 Januari 2013
Jumat, 31 Agustus 2012
The Hypocritical Man
August 31, 2012-When “you” read this, I hope “you” apologize to me.
When I was in senior high school, there was somebody admiring me. Unfortunately, I didn’t like him. I tried to avoid him but he made effort to attract me. He did anything and I began to sympathize with him because he really knew me, he understood me. One thing that I didn’t like from him was that his appearance. I was not a sort of hypocritical person, I searched for someone who was good-looking at that time. Yet still, I accepted the way he was.
Time went by and I was still with him. We didn’t have a special relationship but we did something that couple did as well. Actually, it was not like a real couple but generally it was the same. The different was that we rarely met and there was something like a barrier between us so I felt difficult to express what I felt to him. He convinced me that he did love me by inviting me to a dinner with his family. It was not for once or twice, but three times even more. Honestly, I had no feeling to him because I still thought that he couldn’t be what I wanted him to be.
Then, I decided to leave him and it was in a harsh way. We didn’t get along well for few years until one time, after about 3 years I could talk to him again. He said he still loved me. I thought he didn’t change at all, his appearance, his character, his feeling to me though I didn’t know whether he did love me or not. He had got a job and lived outside this island. We got closer and closer again but it was just for awhile because I realized that he was not what I wanted and I had had a boyfriend.
I didn’t meet him anymore after that separation but we still kept in touch via blackberry messenger. He kept behaving that he loved me but I gave no response. When I was involved in student service project, he called me. He said he wanted to say something but I didn’t want to answer his call. I asked him to text me only but he didn’t want so I just ignored him and had no curiosity about what he was going to talk about.
After finishing the student service project, I heard that he was going to get married. What a big shot it was! What he said to me about his feeling so far, is that true? Or he just lied to me. Or it is I who have wrong suspicion about his feeling. Maybe I am wrong to think that he still loves me while he doesn’t. I think he just wants me to be someone when he needs but when he doesn’t need, he can throw me away. He is such a hypocritical man. I really hate him and I won’t remember anymore about what he has done to me.
He invited me to his marriage but I couldn’t come, I didn’t want to come, and I wouldn’t come. No one knows how big my hateful feeling to him. Now, when I see his picture with another girl, I always want to know and see more and more, why? Am I jealous? Indeed, I AM NOT. But I don’t know for sure, I can say NO yet in the deep of my heart, who knows?! It is too impossible for me to envy. I just think that why does this all happen to me? I don’t believe in him and I don’t want to know about him. No more…
When I was in senior high school, there was somebody admiring me. Unfortunately, I didn’t like him. I tried to avoid him but he made effort to attract me. He did anything and I began to sympathize with him because he really knew me, he understood me. One thing that I didn’t like from him was that his appearance. I was not a sort of hypocritical person, I searched for someone who was good-looking at that time. Yet still, I accepted the way he was.
Time went by and I was still with him. We didn’t have a special relationship but we did something that couple did as well. Actually, it was not like a real couple but generally it was the same. The different was that we rarely met and there was something like a barrier between us so I felt difficult to express what I felt to him. He convinced me that he did love me by inviting me to a dinner with his family. It was not for once or twice, but three times even more. Honestly, I had no feeling to him because I still thought that he couldn’t be what I wanted him to be.
Then, I decided to leave him and it was in a harsh way. We didn’t get along well for few years until one time, after about 3 years I could talk to him again. He said he still loved me. I thought he didn’t change at all, his appearance, his character, his feeling to me though I didn’t know whether he did love me or not. He had got a job and lived outside this island. We got closer and closer again but it was just for awhile because I realized that he was not what I wanted and I had had a boyfriend.
I didn’t meet him anymore after that separation but we still kept in touch via blackberry messenger. He kept behaving that he loved me but I gave no response. When I was involved in student service project, he called me. He said he wanted to say something but I didn’t want to answer his call. I asked him to text me only but he didn’t want so I just ignored him and had no curiosity about what he was going to talk about.
After finishing the student service project, I heard that he was going to get married. What a big shot it was! What he said to me about his feeling so far, is that true? Or he just lied to me. Or it is I who have wrong suspicion about his feeling. Maybe I am wrong to think that he still loves me while he doesn’t. I think he just wants me to be someone when he needs but when he doesn’t need, he can throw me away. He is such a hypocritical man. I really hate him and I won’t remember anymore about what he has done to me.
He invited me to his marriage but I couldn’t come, I didn’t want to come, and I wouldn’t come. No one knows how big my hateful feeling to him. Now, when I see his picture with another girl, I always want to know and see more and more, why? Am I jealous? Indeed, I AM NOT. But I don’t know for sure, I can say NO yet in the deep of my heart, who knows?! It is too impossible for me to envy. I just think that why does this all happen to me? I don’t believe in him and I don’t want to know about him. No more…
Minggu, 27 Mei 2012
The Last Meeting of Creative Writing Class
Today is the last meeting of creative writing class. It is longer than usual because last week was a holiday so this week class covers last week class. Honestly, what we have done in class is not so useful because there is a group which has workshop and the other groups which has no writing to give comment on discuss the story that we have read. Actually on Monday we decided to have workshop for Thursday so this means that every student should prepare something for workshop. As a matter of fact, they bring nothing on Thursday and only 6 students have works for workshop included me. As usual, having workshop is fun when we really discuss and give comment on our friends’ works and I don’t realize that we have had workshop for an hour, it takes many time but I never feel bored.
Honestly, it is a little bit sad and disappointed of having no more class on creative writing. It is because I begin to enjoy writing and doing homework. It can encourage me to write and that I can also express my thought and feeling. Anyway, it doesn’t really matter for me. I can continue other assignments that I should do and I also have to prepare my final project as well as research for the final examination.
Thanks to the lecturer for giving us many knowledge during this semester and also for her willingness and ability to encourage us to write. I hope with the questionnaires we have in the end of the class, she can improve herself and her teaching for next semester. GOOD LUCK!
Honestly, it is a little bit sad and disappointed of having no more class on creative writing. It is because I begin to enjoy writing and doing homework. It can encourage me to write and that I can also express my thought and feeling. Anyway, it doesn’t really matter for me. I can continue other assignments that I should do and I also have to prepare my final project as well as research for the final examination.
Thanks to the lecturer for giving us many knowledge during this semester and also for her willingness and ability to encourage us to write. I hope with the questionnaires we have in the end of the class, she can improve herself and her teaching for next semester. GOOD LUCK!
Writing Autobiography in Italian
I have just realized that I get many things from Italian class. Now I can translate sentences into Italian. I am not sure that I can translate the sentences but when I begin to try translating, I can do it! So, the lecturer asked us to write about autobiography at least 200 words. Firstly, I write in English then I think it will be very complex translating in Italian. As a matter of fact< it is not really difficult but it needs extra effort and patient. It can also be done when we have a good dictionary, I myself use Oxford. Though I don’t translate in one hundred percent right but at least I know how to construct sentences in Italian. Let see my writing and also my translation that has been revised by my lecturer.
La Mia Autobiografia
Sono nato a Yogyakarta il 30 novembre 1990. Ho un fratello, il suo nome è Nicki. Ora cerca di maggiore studio all'università. Mio padre è morto quando avevo 8 anni e ora mia madre ha sposato di nuovo. Lei è un imprenditore, apre un piccolo ristorante in Cirebon. Ho passato tutta la mia vita in Yogyakarta e non voglio lasciare, anche progetto cercare un lavoro qui dentro. Studio all’inglese Dipartimento UGM, ora questo è il mio terzo anno. Mi piace moltissimo della lingua inglese e voglio migliorare la mia abilità che ho otteneto quando ho partecipato corso di inglese. Sono un duro lavoratore, non mi importa aiutare le persone quando bisognano di me. La mia debolezza è che sono perfezionista, quindi cerco sempre di fare tutto perfetamente. Quando non posso farlo perfettamente, rimpiangerò davvero e incolpare me stesso. Per questo motivo, cerco sempre di fare meglio per ottenere che voglio. Facciamo un esempio! Ho deciso prendere questa classe e così devo essere coerente. Quando la classe è in corso, ho una grande difficoltà a imparare una questa lingua. Questa è chiaramente perché non ho mai imparato la lingua europea così sento difficile da ricordare e memorizzare le parole nuove. Perché non voglio essere stupido, cerco di studiare duramente sebbene non sono ancora davvero bravo in questa lingua, almeno sapevo alcune regole e non rinuncio in attesa di un miracolo, vieni da me. Per la mia vita futura, progetto continuare il mio studio all’estero se otteno una borsa di studio. Poi, voglio essere una insegnante di inglese. Con speranza, può insegnare nel mio dipartimento. Sogno sempre ottenere un buono lavoro di modo che posso aiutare la mia madre a costruire e migliorare il suo affare. Vorrei che posso rendere la mia famiglia felice.
La Mia Autobiografia
Sono nato a Yogyakarta il 30 novembre 1990. Ho un fratello, il suo nome è Nicki. Ora cerca di maggiore studio all'università. Mio padre è morto quando avevo 8 anni e ora mia madre ha sposato di nuovo. Lei è un imprenditore, apre un piccolo ristorante in Cirebon. Ho passato tutta la mia vita in Yogyakarta e non voglio lasciare, anche progetto cercare un lavoro qui dentro. Studio all’inglese Dipartimento UGM, ora questo è il mio terzo anno. Mi piace moltissimo della lingua inglese e voglio migliorare la mia abilità che ho otteneto quando ho partecipato corso di inglese. Sono un duro lavoratore, non mi importa aiutare le persone quando bisognano di me. La mia debolezza è che sono perfezionista, quindi cerco sempre di fare tutto perfetamente. Quando non posso farlo perfettamente, rimpiangerò davvero e incolpare me stesso. Per questo motivo, cerco sempre di fare meglio per ottenere che voglio. Facciamo un esempio! Ho deciso prendere questa classe e così devo essere coerente. Quando la classe è in corso, ho una grande difficoltà a imparare una questa lingua. Questa è chiaramente perché non ho mai imparato la lingua europea così sento difficile da ricordare e memorizzare le parole nuove. Perché non voglio essere stupido, cerco di studiare duramente sebbene non sono ancora davvero bravo in questa lingua, almeno sapevo alcune regole e non rinuncio in attesa di un miracolo, vieni da me. Per la mia vita futura, progetto continuare il mio studio all’estero se otteno una borsa di studio. Poi, voglio essere una insegnante di inglese. Con speranza, può insegnare nel mio dipartimento. Sogno sempre ottenere un buono lavoro di modo che posso aiutare la mia madre a costruire e migliorare il suo affare. Vorrei che posso rendere la mia famiglia felice.
Going to Pizza Pazza Today
Today, after the last creative writing class, my friend and I plan to go to a pizza restaurant in Jalan Kaliurang named Pizza Pazza. We really wanted to go there since few weeks ago and now we have more time and money to eat there. It is a real Italian pizza because the chef is Italian and he is my Italian lecturer’s brother. My lecturer said to us in class that his brother opened a pizza restaurant and we were directly excited to taste the real Italian pizza. Actually I usually go to Nanamia when I want to eat pizza but my Italian lecturer said that Nanamia is not the original of Italian pizza. He said that the chefs in Nanamia only put some cheese so all pizzas there have a strong cheese taste and they have the same taste. However, they should have different taste with other kinds of pizza.
So, we leave at 3.30 p.m. and it takes about half an hour to get there. Unfortunately, it is closed. Indeed, we are very disappointed. We have imagined that we will taste the real Italian pizza but we can’t. I don’t know why it is closed because it usually opens in the afternoon until night. We still want to eat pizza, not any other food so we decide to go to Nanamia and order Napoli. It is a pizza with anchovies, paprika, onion, and mozzarella toping. We are quite satisfied and we want more but we are out of money. :D
So, we leave at 3.30 p.m. and it takes about half an hour to get there. Unfortunately, it is closed. Indeed, we are very disappointed. We have imagined that we will taste the real Italian pizza but we can’t. I don’t know why it is closed because it usually opens in the afternoon until night. We still want to eat pizza, not any other food so we decide to go to Nanamia and order Napoli. It is a pizza with anchovies, paprika, onion, and mozzarella toping. We are quite satisfied and we want more but we are out of money. :D
Sabtu, 19 Mei 2012
Feeling Remorse of being Procrastinator
I planned to join writing competition. I read this competition announcement few months ago and the application submission would be closed this May. I am sort of a procrastinator, I will do a work when the deadline is closer. I guess some of my friends in class share the same thing with me. So, this writing competition required the participants to write about Dutch creativity. The winner of this competition would join two-week short course in Dutch. Since I admire Dutch so much, I am really interested to join this competition. The participants were required to write at least one writing or more, but no more than 3 writings on this topic. They should post them in their blog and send the link of their writings to the committee. The submission of the link was opened from April 16. During the time of the submission, I tried to write well and I have posted my writings in my blog. I wrote 2 writings on Dutch creativity in industry and education. Actually I have done writing and I was waiting for the exact time to send this link. I was thinking of sending the link on May 15 at night but I thought I had to edit them again. I did not really notice when the submission was closed. As far as I remembered, this submission would be closed on May 16. So, in the next morning on May 16, I turned on my laptop and began to review my writings. Then, I connected my laptop to the internet and opened the website of the competition. What a really big shot it was when I saw the final date of the submission was on May 15! I really felt remorse of being procrastinator. I wish I didn’t procrastinate and sent the link to the committee earlier. Though I was not sure to be the winner, at least I have tried. But my chance now disappears and that there is no hope anymore. I will always remember the 16th day of May.
I am in Love
Again, I am falling in love
I no longer want to feel it
for the feeling often tortures me
I no longer want to feel it
for you always come in my mind bothering me
I no longer want to feel it
for I want to do nothing without you
When I see people in love, and I am as well,
I feel what they feel yet it is different
Theirs is sweeter than mine, I think
I am thinking of having an affinity with you
though I realize it is impossible
I can only feel it with my pain
Again, I am falling in love
I no longer want to feel it
for the feeling often tortures me
I no longer want to feel it
for you always come in my mind bothering me
I no longer want to feel it
for I want to do nothing without you
When I see people in love, and I am as well,
I feel what they feel yet it is different
Theirs is sweeter than mine, I think
I am thinking of having an affinity with you
though I realize it is impossible
I can only feel it with my pain
Again, I am falling in love
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